My Little Fire

My beautiful first born is definitely going to be the one to test my patience. She's incredibly bright and that seems to get her into a lot of trouble. She's always trying to find the easy way out or think her way out of a situation (like homework) that she doesn't want to be in. I know one day, these skills are going to be what saves her and allows her to thrive. But today is not that day!

To help protect all of my children, I will not refer to them by their given names, just as I refer to myself by my chosen witch name instead of my given name. For this daughter, I will refer to her as Ayden.

I just want to put out there for the record that Ayden is not a trouble child at all. She tests her limits like every kid does. She is incredibly compassionate, something that seems to run in the family, and a very hard worker. When she sets her mind to do something, she gets it done.

Like most first time mothers I had no idea that I was in labor with her when I first started noticing contractions. It was the day before her due date and I truly thought I was constipated. I had woken up at 4 in the morning and it took until around 7 before I realized that I was having contractions. I had already been walking around for a week at 3 cm dilated so I knew that I would have her at any point. I labored at home as long as I dared then had my mother drive me and my then boyfriend (her dad) to the hospital. I continued to labor at the hospital, walking and using the tub to soak in. Around lunch time they broke my water and I started going into the more intense part of labor.

After only 6 minutes of pushing, I welcomed this beautiful baby girl into the world. I had a second degree internal tear that ended up needing to be stitched right away but other than that I was fine. The nurses said that if they gave 10's on the APGAR (a perfect score) that she would have gotten one because she was textbook perfect.

Being a new mother and new to breastfeeding, I had no idea why I couldn't get her to latch. I had no idea why I ran out of colostrum and no idea why my milk wasn't coming in as fast as I thought it would. I didn't know how much I didn't know until way later. I ended up pumping and feeding her what I could for about 2 months before it became too much for me to keep up with. But I am grateful for my experience because it paved the way for me to research more before having my other children and I learned from my mistakes.

After all, isn't that what oldest children are for? Experimenting?

Blessed Be!

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